Monday, February 16, 2009

the mystery dog

I saw him one day. he was wearing a collar, but it was loose and just served a purpose of the slightest sign of conformity. like mocking conformity all together. this dog barked and barked. strangely, when I stroked him, he calmed down. he became gentle. a dog had seemed so fierce and angry, was actually the sweetest being with wings. I grew so infatuated with the dog, that I could know longer hear the growling or the gnashing, I only heard it's heart. th-ump th-ump th-ump. It's beat was intoxicating. I got lost in the rhythm. my heart soared. just as i was about to jump, I thought that I could fly. the collar came off.
it was a moment where I thought that I could fly with the dog, or die alone. fall all the way down. I missed the beating of my own heart. it was there. it is still there. th-ump th-ump

so in ending it...

you have to blast the blacks and lower the white. to keep it going, you add a soft filter. you make the blacks lest contrasted.

I mean memories. like the corners of my mind. the part that keeps me in, kills the part of me that wants out. I want out. I want nothing to do with that woman ever again. she can be kind and funny. but she is sick. my staying in with her, just tells the world that I am in denial about her denial. there fore my sickness gets perpetuated.

do you know the way?

lonely but satisfied. creatively uninspired. you can see my problem. my arrows are pointing north and south. do you ever have someone in your life that you hate? yet, if you stopped knowing them, you would hate yourself. the arrows keep pointing. north and southing east and westing. I don't know. I lose gage inside myself that tells me the way.

thank you for stopping by